Human After All

So, today's my birthday. Happy freakin' birthday.

I'm a little bitter as I am spending it on the other side of the country, away from my family and friends - but most importantly - away from my TWIN sister. This may be the first birthday we've been apart in 28 years. I mean, come on now, we shared a fucking womb.

I've been very open that being a twin is the greatest experience of my life, and the fact that we're so close is truly great. I mean, I was able to grow up with my best friend, sharing all our intimate secrets, and being holy terrors by constantly ganging up on my parents.

Quick one of my favorite twin stories. One day in high school, on the drive there, my sister and I decided to skip out on school, head to the mall. Now, normally, this is no big deal, however my father worked at the local Vo-Tech, and so got our schools bulletin which listed all the absent students. Of course he noticed both of his childrens names' on the bulletin. So, after school, arriving home, my dad confronted us on it. I was like a deer in headlights - This wasn't my first OR last absent day - but my sister smiled, and simply said "Didn't go. Twin bonding day." My dad was speechless, then turned away shaking his head, muttering "twin bonding day."

She can be an evil genius sometimes, don't let the bubblyness and cuteness fool you.

SO, last night I notice that I'm an east coast boy, and so there for at 9:01PM on the west coast it was my official birthday. And, it being 12:01AM on the east coast, I'd call my sister, disturbing her precious sleep, and wish her a very loud, very obnoxiuos "HAAAAAPPPPYYYY BIIIRRRTTTHHHDAAAAAAYYY!!!!"

Nothing but net. swoosh.

Then, before we hit the road for San Diego (I'm leaving in like 5 minutes), there's a knock at the door (I'm sleeping on the regional salewoman's couch). I open the door, expecting a package from the office, instead getting a package from my sister. She overnighted me a birthday card and present.

I crumble, tears rolling down my face, blubbering like a little school boy.

A three point shot at the buzzer. Team me goes down in defeat.


Anyway, happy birthday to my best friend forever: My Twin Sister Andrea.


and me too, godammit.